Don't just sit there! The big game is coming up soon! You've got to make sure you're warmed up and ready to kick ass!

The following Crusaders will get a buff this weekend starting from today until 12 pm PST on Monday January 30th.

• The Bush Whacker - Critical Click Chance +6%
• The Princess - Ignite, Char, Conflagrate, and Incinerate abilities +200%
• Dark Gryphon - All Gold Find +200%
• Prince Sal, the Merman - Base DPS +400%
• Groklok - Eligible Receivers, Gunslinger, and Defensive Team abilities +200%

Also, check out the limited-time Pregame Jeweled Chests that contain equipment for the five Crusaders above! (Please note: The chest will only contain gear for Groklok if you've unlocked him.)

Put on your cleats, Crusaders! It's time for the Carnage Cup: the most violent, the most painful, and by far the most exciting hand-egg ball competition in the whole universe! Recruit all four of the Carnage Cup Crusaders, including two brand new ones, as you throw, run, and kick your way to victory.

The tailgate party is underway and now the game begins starting today and running through to February 7th at Noon PST. For those players who haven't unlocked them already, this is your chance to add both Groklok and Drizzle to your roster.

Of course, as this is a 2017 update of the original event you can also collect two new Crusaders: Karl the Kicker and Cindy the Cheer-Orc.

New Tier Two Crusader: Karl the Kicker.

Karl the Kicker takes up the same slot as Natalie Dragon and has some cool abilities in his kit bag. At level 50 Split the Uprights divides your DPS evenly between the front-most and back-most enemies (if there's only one enemy, it will take full normal damage; if two, each takes 50% of total DPS).

At level 400, Karl unlocks Play Of The Game where the back-most enemy takes an additional 40% damage (multiplicative; so front-most takes 50% of total DPS, back-most takes 70% of total DPS)

New Tier Two Crusader: Cindy the Cheer-Orc.

Cindy the Cheer-Orc has some cool abilities hidden in her pom-poms. At level 50, she unlocks Top of the Pyramid which will buff other Crusaders' DPS up to 25% per slot based on how far away they are from Cindy. At level 400 her Practice Makes Perfect ability increases the effect of Top of the Pyramid based on the area you've reached by 10% (multiplicative) per 50 areas.

After you've completed the first new Tier Two objectives for Karl and Cindy, there are three more objectives to keep you busy.

New Tier Two Objective: Flag On The Play.

In Flag On The Play referees spawn as monsters, and when they die, they throw a flag on one of your Crusaders disabling their DPS and Formation Abilities for 30 seconds.

New Tier Two Objective: Stand By For This Important Word From Our Sponsor.

Stand By For This Important Word From Our Sponsor introduces TV sets interminably promoting various products you absolutely have to own. When a TV dies, you get a random positive or negative effect for a few seconds (e.g. reduced global DPS, reduced gold bonus, increased global DPS, or increased gold bonus).

New Tier Two Objective: Halftime Show.

The final new Tier Two objective is Halftime Show. A singer and several musical instruments take up space in your formation. The singer performs for 10 seconds every 10-20 seconds. Whenever the singer is singing, the deafening noise reduces your DPS by 99.99%. When she stops, your DPS returns at a rate of 5% per second.

Equipment for both Tier 1 and 2 Crusaders can be found in Carange Cup Silver and Jeweled Chests. However, gear for the Tier 2 Crusaders will only appear once you've unlocked the respective Crusader.

You'll have until February 7th at Noon PST to win the Championship and claim the Carnage Cup trophy. Go team!

Get your grinding shoes on, because this week's update adds sixteen new objectives via new tier 2 and tier 3 versions of all the Ready Player Two campaign objectives!

Whether you're dodging anvils, capturing Polkamans, or avoiding being backstabbed in the Video Game of Thrones, these new objectives are sure to challenge you! You'll need the Tier 2 or Tier 3 talent to play them, and many, many, many idols to defeat them. We've also added a new weekend buff event to help you get started. Good luck!

Here's a glimpse at some of the new objectives additions:

Glitch Out Tier 2

Formation slots are randomly glitched, disabling Crusaders in them to area 600.

Video Game of Thrones Tier 2

Every 10 seconds, a random Crusader in your formation is betrayed and killed all the way to area 600.

Couch Co-op Tier 3

Beat area 700 while using only four Crusaders at a time while enemies have significantly more health.
To help you through the tough new Tier 2 and 3 objectives, there's a weekend buff. Starting today, the five Crusaders below will receive boosts until Monday, January 23 at Noon PST.

• Emo Werewolf - Base DPS +400%
• Jason, the Master of Shadows - Gold Find +200%
• Khouri, the Witch Doctor - Koffee Potion ability +200%
• Merci, the Mad Wizard - Deflect Evil ability +200%
• President Billy Smithsonian - Us Vs. Them ability +200%

Also, check out the limited-time Ski Trip Jeweled Chests that contain equipment for the five Crusaders above! (Please note: The chest will only contain gear for President Billy if you've unlocked him.)

The royal family is tired of sitting around decreeing things. Take them out of a fun vacation this weekend and finish up your most challenging event objectives!

The following Crusaders will get a buff this weekend starting from today until 12 pm PST on Monday January 16th.

• Jim the Lumberjack - Sharpen Party Ability +200%
• The Princess - All Gold Find +200%
• Thalia the Thunder King - Storm Rider Ability +200%
• Val the Mermaid - All DPS +200%
• Queen Siri - Queen's Decree Ability +200%

Also, check out the limited-time Royal Vacation Jeweled Chests that contain equipment for the five Crusaders above! (Please note: The chest will only contain gear for Val and Queen Siri if you've unlocked them.)

It's time for a fun romp down the freeway to see a big cow made out of butter. We've buffed the Crusaders with the best sense of direction to help you out this weekend.

The following Crusaders will get a buff this weekend starting from today until 12 pm PST on Monday January 9th.

• The Washed-Up Hermit - Craziness Ability +200%
• Detective Kaine - A-Hah! Ability +200%
• Natalie Dragon - All Gold Find +200%
• Sarah the Collector - Base DPS +400%
• Pilot Pam - Focused Teamwork Ability +200%

Also, check out the limited-time Road Trip Jeweled Chests that contain equipment for the five Crusaders above! (Please note: The chest will only contain gear for Pilot Pam if you've unlocked her.)

Now that all of the holiday festivities are behind us, it's time to look forward to the next fun event: it's time to book a vacation to escape the January blues.

Starting today and running through to January 17th at Noon PST, The Princess is heading abroad to host her annual pool party event. For those players who haven't unlocked them already, this is your chance to add both Pilot Pam and Queen Siri to your roster.

Of course, as this is a 2017 update of the original event you can also collect two new Crusaders: Bernard the Bartender and Princess Val the Mermaid.

New Tier Two Crusader: Bernard the Bartender.

Bernard the Bartender shares the same slot as Detective Kaine. He includes some fun formation abilities such as Tips!. This ability has a base 20% chance that you'll receive 20% more gold from an enemy when it's killed. The chance can be increased with other upgrades and gear.

At level 400, Bernard unlocks Girl's Night where every female Crusader in the formation adds an additive 20% boost to the Tips! bonus gold.

New Tier Two Crusader: Princess Val the Mermaid.

Princess Val the Mermaid also packed some fun new abilities. At level 25, she unlocks Royal Blessing. With it, all adjacent Crusaders are healed by 20% per tick, split between the number of affected Crusaders. This is boosted by other upgrades as well. At level 400 her Animal Kingdom ability increases the global DPS by +50% if there are more animal Crusaders than human Crusaders in the formation.

After you've completed the first two new Tier Two objectives for Bernard and Val, there are three more objectives to keep you busy.

New Tier Two Objective: The Great Migration.

The Great Migration sees the Crusaders beset by migrating birds determined to bring your holiday plans crashing to the ground. These fowl foul instantly kill any Crusader they hit in a puff of blood and feathers all the way to area 400.

New Tier Two Objective: Girl's Getaway.

Girl's Getaway! forces you to only select female Crusaders alongside Bernard because what kind of a holiday doesn't have alcohol, especially when there's a long way to go to area 450.

New Tier Two Objective: Don't Get Sunburnt.

The final new Tier Two objective is Don't Get Sunburnt. The hot objective sees the Crusaders DPS suffer in the sun's rays. The longer the Crusaders are in the formation earning XP, the less DPS they do, making reaching area 500 quite a challenge!

Equipment for both Tier 1 and 2 Crusaders can be found in Pool Party Silver and Jeweled Chests. However, gear for the Tier 2 Crusaders will only appear once you've unlocked the respective Crusader.

You'll have until January 17th at Noon PST to complete the event before it's time to fly home and spend another year only dreaming of sunny beaches and lazy pool days.